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Grief Observed: Using Movies to Move through Grief
by Marty Tousley, Bereavement Counselor
Movies and video rentals that dramatize others coming to terms with their pain may serve as a valuable tool to help you and your family members move through the grieving process.
Healthy grieving requires that we acknowledge, experience and express the pain of our loss. For many of us, this is the hardest part of grief work, and we may prefer to put it off or avoid it all together. Sometimes we need help to get started, both in getting in touch with the pain and in finding the relief that comes from having a good cry.
Watching a sad movie can be a simple but very effective way to put us in touch with our feelings and help release the pent-up emotions of grief. Movies carefully chosen and watched with conscious awareness can stimulate discussion among family members, release tears that need to be shed, and even provide hope for the future, especially when their story lines begin in despair and end in triumph.
In this spirit, this list of movies for those in mourning is offered, categorized by the aspect of grief primarily addressed in a given film or video. For description of movies and reviews, click movie title.
Mystical Experiences
A Rumor of Angels (2000), with Vanessa Redgrave & Ray Liotta
Sixth Sense (1999) with Bruce Willis, Haley Joel Osment
City of Angels (1998), with Nicolas Cage and Meg Ryan
Truly, Madly, Deeply (1996), with Juliet Stevenson and Alan Rickman
Ghost (1990), with Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze
Always (1989), with Richard Dreyfuss and Holly Hunter
Guilt
Moonlight Mile (2002) with Jake Gyllenhaal, Dustin Hoffman, Susan Sarandon
A Rumor of Angels (2000), with Vanessa Redgrave & Ray Liotta
Ordinary People (1980) with Donald Sutherland & Mary Tyler Moore
Sixth Sense (1999) with Bruce Willis
Spiritual Reaction to Loss
Shadowlands (1994) with Anthony Hopkins, Debra Winger
Sixth Sense (1999) with Bruce Willis
Wide Awake (1998) with Joseph Cross, Timothy Reifsnyder, Dana Delany, Denis Leary
Finding Professional Help
Ordinary People (1980) with Donald Sutherland & Mary Tyler Moore
Understanding Different Grieving Patterns in Your Family
Moonlight Mile (2002) with Jake Gyllenhaal, Dustin Hoffman, Susan Sarandon
Marvin's Room (1996), with Meryl Streep, Diane Keaton and Leonardo DiCaprio
Little Women (1994), with Wynona Ryder and Susan Sarandon
Steel Magnolias (1989), with Sally Field and Shirley MacLaine
Beaches (1988), with Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey
Terms of Endearment (1983), with Shirley MacLaine and Debra Winger
Ordinary People (1980) with Donald Sutherland & Mary Tyler Moore
In America (2002) with Paddy Considine, Samantha Morton
Writing As A Way of Expressing Grief
About Schmidt (2002) with Jack Nicholson, Hope Davis
From Surviving to Transcending Your Grief
About Schmidt (2002) with Jack Nicholson, Hope Davis
Message In a Bottle (1999), with Kevin Costner and Robin Wright Penn
Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994), with Hugh Grant and Andie MacDowell
Shadowlands (1994) with Anthony Hopkins, Debra Winger
Corrina, Corrina (1994) with Whoopi Goldberg and Ray Liotta
A River Runs through It (1992), with Robert Redford, Brad Pitt, Craig Sheffer
Whose Life Is It Anyway (1991), with Richard Dreyfuss
Brian's Song (1971), with James Caan and Billy Dee Williams
In America (2002) with Paddy Considine, Samantha Morton
Loss of A Sibling
In America (2002) with Paddy Considine, Samantha Morton
Loss of A Friend
Midnight Cowboy (1969) with Dustin Hoffman, Jon Voight
Beaches (1988) with Bette Midler, Barbara Hershey
Getting in touch with the painful feelings of grief and releasing blocked or pent-up emotions by having a good cry can be cleansing and stress-reducing. Movies can be an effective tool in addressing certain grief issues, especially when your selections are made consciously and deliberately.
Before you see or rent a movie, take time to read the film's description and reviews to help you decide whether watching it will support you at this point in your grief journey. Pay attention to whatever feelings and reactions come up for you while watching it, and let yourself cry if you need to. If you're not comfortable doing this alone, ask a trusted friend or family member to watch the movie with you, and discuss it together afterward.
Browse this section by alphabetical
order or return to Dealing with Grief & Loss Self-Help Section
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