Chuck Norris Sayings And Quotes

by allinspiration.com

“When Chuck Norris holds the iPhone 4 the signal increases”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Trying to figure out what move Chuck Norris used to take over gods position”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“This message was round house kicked by Chuck Norris”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“The best part of waking up IS NOT Folgers in your cup. It is knowing that Chuck Norris did not kill you in your sleep.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“…and on the first day, Chuck Norris made god”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris went to the Virgin Islands and came back and they were just called The Islands”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris can rip your head off and throw it completely around the world before you die. Which is pretty cool because you’re like Wheeee! I’m a satellite!. But then you die. Unless Chuck puts your head back on.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris deflected all three bullets with his beard. JFKs head exploded out of sheer amazement.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“The movie Anaconda was shot in Chuck Norris’ underwear…”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Thinks Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together. What do you know about Chuck?”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“…so, looking toward 2012, maybe we could use another Reagan. Hmm. Conservative B-Movie actor… I’ve got it!! Chuck Norris FOR PRESIDENT”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“How the hell did Chuck Norris become so important?”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“If at first you don’t succeed… you’re not Chuck Norris”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“If Chuck Norris is so bad ass.. please explain the TV show Chuck Norris: Karate Kommandos”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“I Love listening to 2 fathers argue about whose kid is better. Cause both the kids end up winning Olympic medals or being Chuck Norris.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris was invited to a birthday party. He dared one kid to suck all the helium of the balloons. This kid is now known as Justin Beiber”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“I don’t need walls around my heart… why? because Chuck Norris is guarding it”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris once told Steven Hawkins to sit down, he hasn’t gotten up since…”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“If Chuck Norris sleeps he sleeps with one eye open cause he knows I will get him.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Why did Chuck Norris aunt give birth to him? no one had the balls to sleep with his mom”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris bottles his farts and sells them on Craigslist as cans of whoop ass”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“When Chuck Norris does pull ups he doesn’t lower himself to the ground but lifts the earth to him”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he’s telling you how many seconds you have left to live.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“some people wear superman pajamas, superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris does not wear a condom because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris once donated 5 gallons of blood to Red Cross, none of it was his.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“There used to be a street named Chuck Norris but they had to change it cause nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“Chuck Norris deleted his Facebook & created fist book!”
– Chuck Norris Saying

“How many woodchucks would Chuck Norris chuck if Chuck Norris would chuck woodchucks?”
– Chuck Norris Saying

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