Golf Sayings – Funny Or Inspiring Quotes

by allinspiration.com

If you love this sport, you will enjoy many of these golf sayings and quotes. Some are inspirational, while some are humorous.

“Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad.”
– A.A. Milne

“Men who would face torture without a word become blasphemous at the short fourteenth. It is clear that the game of golf may well be included in that category of intolerable provocations which may legally excuse or mitigate behaviour not otherwise excusable.”
– A.P. Herbert

“Playing the game I have learned the meaning of humility. It has given me an understanding of futility of the human effort.”
– Abba Eban

“Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses.”
– Adlai Stevenson

“Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?”
– Al Boliska

“Golf is an open exhibition of overweening ambition, courage deflated by stupidity, skill scoured by a whiff of arrogance.”
– Alistair Cooke

“I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone’s golf game: it’s called an eraser.”
– Arnold Palmer

“What other people may find in poetry or art museums, I find in the flight of a good drive.”
– Arnold Palmer

“Golf is a game in which the ball lies poorly and the players well.”
– Art Rosenbaum

“Golf is like a love affair. If you don’t take it seriously, it’s no fun; if you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart.”
– Arthur Daley

“Golf is hockey at the halt.”
– Arthur Marshall

“Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it’s called the PGA Tour.”
– Author Alex Hay

“A golf course is nothing but a poolroom moved outdoors.”
– Barry Fitzgerald

“I’m about five inches from being an outstanding golfer. That’s the distance my left ear is from my right.”
– Ben Crenshaw

“Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf swing.”
– Ben Hogan

“The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.”
– Billy Graham

“What’s nice about our tour is you can’t remember your bad shots.”
– Bob Bruce

“Drugs are very much a part of professional sports today, but when you think about it, golf is the only sport where the players aren’t penalized for being on grass.”
– Bob Hope

“I just hope I don’t have to explain all the times I’ve used His name in vain when I get up there.”
– Bob Hope

“I’ll shoot my age if I have to live to be 105.”
– Bob Hope

“If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him.”
– Bob Hope

“Isn’t it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?”
– Bob Hope

“A passion, an obsession, a romance, a nice acquaintanceship with trees, sand, and water.”
– Bob Ryan

“Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course – the distance between your ears.”
– Bobby Jones

“I’d play every day if I could. It’s cheaper than a shrink and there are no telephones on my golf cart.”
– Brent Musburger

“It’s easy to see golf not as a game at all but as some whey-faced, nineteenth-century Presbyterian minister’s fever dream of exorcism achieved through ritual and self-mortification.”
– Bruce McCall

“No game designed to be played with the aid of personal servants by right-handed men who can’t even bring along their dogs can be entirely good for the soul.”
– Bruce McCall

“Any game where a man 60 can beat a man 30 ain’t no game.”
– Burt Shotten

“The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“A golf ball is like a clock. Always hit it at 6 o’clock and make it go toward 12 o’clock. But make sure you’re in the same time zone.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“Trevino is in a league by himself. We don’t even count him. We figure when you come in second, you’re a winner.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“Golf is the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“I never pray to God to make a putt. I pray to God to help me react good if I miss a putt.”
– Chi Chi Rodriguez

“My handicap? Woods and irons.”
– Chris Codiroli

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