Valentine Funny Quotes And Sayings

by allinspiration.com

“Sad thing is, you can still love someone and be wrong for them.”
– Elvis Presley

“My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes.”
– Emo Philips

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.”
– Erich Segal

“Love is a game that two can play and both win.”
– Eva Gabor

“Look, there’s no metaphysics on earth like chocolates.”
– Fernando Pessoa

“It is impossible to love and be wise.”
– Francis Bacon

“It is probably not love that makes the world go around, but rather those mutually supportive alliances through which partners recognize their dependence on each other for the achievement of shared and private goals.”
– Fred Allen

“Love, and a cough, cannot be hid.”
– George Herbert

“Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and give her a house.”
– Groucho Marx

“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”
– Groucho Marx

“To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia.”
– H.L. Mencken

“A man loses his sense of direction after four drinks; A woman loses hers after four. kisses.”
– H.L. Mencken

“Without love, what are we worth? Eighty-nine cents! Eighty-nine cents worth of chemicals walking around lonely.”
– Hawkeye, M.A.S.H.

“A bride at her second wedding does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.”
– Helen Rowland

“Between lovers a little confession is a dangerous thing.”
– Helen Rowland

“Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There’s too much fraternizing with the enemy.”
– Henry Kissinger

“I’m tired of love; I’m still more tired of rhyme; but money gives me pleasure all the time.”
– Hilaire Belloc

“Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots.”
– Hoosier Farmer

“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.”
– Ingrid Bergman

“It takes a lot experience for a girl to kiss like a beginner.”
– Ingrid Bergman

“Love is what you’ve been through with somebody.”
– James Thurber

“Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.”
– Jay Leno

“Love is friendship set on fire.”
– Jeremy Taylor

“Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it.”
– Jerome K. Jerome

“All you need is love.”
– John Lennon

“Love is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.”
– John Waters

“Happy Valentine’s Day! And if this is news to you, my guess is you’re probably alone. Valentine’s Day is often times a, well, it’s a manufactured day that really doesn’t mean anything.”
– Jon Stewart

“Lord! I wonder what fool it was that first invented kissing.”
– Jonathon Swift

“No matter how love sick a woman is, she shouldn’t take the first pill that comes along.”
– Joyce Brothers

“Love doesn’t grow on trees like apples in Eden – it’s something you have to make. And you must use your imagination too.”
– Joyce Carol Oates

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5

Follow this site