Valentine Humor For A Good Laugh

by allinspiration.com

“This Valentine’s Day I want
a romantic meal…
Any place that doesn’t ask,
‘You want any fries with that?’”
– Unknown

“It’s not every day that I tell you
I love you…
OK, maybe it is,
but Valentine’s Day
is still special.”
– Unknown

“Hearts and flowers…
Poetry…
Love songs…
Ribbons and bows…
Yeah, I’d rather have the chocolate, too!

Happy Valentine’s Day”
– Unknown

“I love you more now
….than when you began
to read this Valentine’s card”
– Unknown

“I don’t understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine’s Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.”
– Unknown

“I can already smell all the roses I’m not going to receive on Valentine’s Day.”
– Unknown

“I hope you enjoy what the Internet told me to plan for you this Valentine’s Day.”
– Unknown

“Happy Valentine’s Day to your pants pocket since it calls me more than you do.”
– Unknown

“This Valentine’s Day, I want you to know exactly how I feel about you in someone else’s words.”
– Unknown

“I promise to still find you attractive when you’re bloated from the Valentine’s Day meal and candy I buy you.”
– Unknown

“Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to reflect on all your horrible dating choices since last Valentine’s Day.”
– Unknown

“May your Valentine’s Day dinner have the romantic lighting of a stadium blackout.”
– Unknown

“Congratulations on being my first repeat Valentine.”
– Unknown

“Just remember that being alone on Valentine’s Day is no different than any other day of your life.”
– Unknown

“It’s not what you do for me on Valentine’s Day that matters but the amount of jealousy it provokes in others.”
– Unknown

“Let’s have a quiet, relaxing, multi-course dinner cooked by you at home this Valentine’s Day.”
– Unknown

“Nothing Steve Jobs ever created could fully replace you in my life.”
– Unknown

“Happy Valentine’s Day to someone who raised me, loved me unconditionally, and made me almost capable of having a functional relationship.”
– Unknown

“Happy early Valentine’s Day to someone who should already be planning the greatest night of my life.”
– Unknown

“May your Valentine’s Day be full of all the sinful things people are giving up for Lent.”
– Unknown

“Any dude that waits till Valentine’s day to treat his woman like a queen is failing 364 days a year.”
– Unknown

“Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, they are not blue.”
– Unknown

“A dozen roses: $12, a box of chocolates: $10, a Happy Valentines Day card: $2, still having $24 dollars because you’re single: priceless!”
– Unknown

“For Valentine’s Day, I’m going to do nothing. But the next day, I’m going to buy all the discount chocolates I like.”
– Unknown

“I saved a bunch of money on Valentines Day by switching to…single.”
– Unknown

“Roses are red, violets are blue. If your man is busy on Valentines Day, then the side chick is you.”
– Unknown

“After valentines day guess what? Cuffing season is over! Everybody is going to be breaking up once it gets warm.”
– Unknown

“The awkward moment when you realize Valentines day is approaching fast and the only one who loves you is your pet…”
– Unknown

“Valentine’s Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is.”
– Unknown

“Love – a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise, and the lips to pucker.”
– Unknown

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