Yet More Dog Sayings And Quotes

by allinspiration.com

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.”
– Dave Barry

“You can say any fool thing to a dog, and the dog will give you this look that says, “My God, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!”"
– Dave Barry

“When a dog barks at the moon, then it is religion; but when he barks at strangers, it is patriotism!”
– David Starr Jordan

“I love women, but I feel like you can’t trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog’s name. Then I said, ‘Does he bite?’ She said, ‘No.’ And I said, ‘Oh yeah? Then how does he eat?’ Liar.”
– Demetri Martin 

“I like women, but you can’t always trust them. Some of them are big liars, like this one woman I met who had a dog. I asked her her dog’s name and then I asked, ‘Does he bite?’ and she said, ‘No.’ And I said, ‘So how does he eat?’ Liar!”
– Demetri Martin 

“In order to keep a true perspective of one’s importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.”
– Dereke Bruce

“Some days you’re the dog; some days you’re the hydrant.”
– Dima Yeremenko 

“There’s a tremendous difference between alone and lonely. You could be lonely in a group of people. I like being alone. I like eating by myself. I go home at night and just watch a movie or hang out with my dog. I have to exert myself and really say, oh God, I’ve got to see my friends ’cause I’m too content being by myself.”
– Drew Barrymore 

“What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight – it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”
– Dwight D. Eisenhower 

“My little dog – a heartbeat at my feet.”
– Edith Wharton

“When a man’s best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.”
– Edward Abbey

“In order to really enjoy a dog, one doesn’t merely try to train him to be semi human. The point of it is to open oneself to the possibility of becoming partly a dog.”
– Edward Hoagland

“With the exception of women, there is nothing on earth so agreeable or necessary to the comfort of man as the dog. ”
– Edward Jesse

“Some of my best leading men have been dogs and horses.”
– Elizabeth Taylor

“You ask of my companions. Hills, sir, and the sundown, and a dog as large as myself that my father bought me. They are better than human beings, because they know but do not tell.”
– Emily Dickinson

“When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he’s doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.”
– Erma Bombeck 

“Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.”
– Erma Bombeck 

“In modern war… you will die like a dog for no good reason.”
– Ernest Hemingway 

“They wrote in the old days that it is sweet and fitting to die for one’s country. But in modern war, there is nothing sweet nor fitting in your dying. You will die like a dog for no good reason.”
– Ernest Hemingway 

“If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater… suggest that he wear a tail.”
– Fran Lebowitz

“A dog, I will maintain, is a very tolerable judge of beauty, as appears from the fact that any liberally educated dog does, in a general way, prefer a woman to a man.”
– Frances Thompson

“Anybody who doesn’t know what soap tastes like never washed a dog.”
– Franklin P. Jones

“Scratch a dog and you’ll find a permanent job.”
– Franklin P. Jones

“Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called ‘Ego’.”
– Friedrich Nietzsche 

“I always like a dog so long as he isn’t spelled backward.”
– G.K. Chesterton

“Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot little puppies.”
– Gene Hill

“I like a bit of mongrel myself, whether it’s a man or a dog; they’re the best for everyday.”
– George Bernard Shaw

“I think we are drawn to dogs because they are the uninhibited creatures we might be if we weren’t certain we knew better. They fight for honor at the first challenge, make love with no moral restraint, and they do not for all their marvelous instincts appear to know about death. Being such wonderfully uncomplicated beings, they need us to do their worrying.”
– George Bird Evans

“Life is a series of dogs.”
– George Carlin

“We long for an affection altogether ignorant of our faults. Heaven has accorded this to us in the uncritical canine attachment.”
– George Eliot

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